A New Hello

My last update was on 2016 , I know I come back and leave. Lot of things changed but not the biggest scars those marked my heart like a tattoo. Sometimes I don't want to think about it at all or maybe sometimes I feel like I want to erase everything that could be erased. But back then I think again it's not fair for the good thing to be forgotten just like that and so then whatever happen, I manage to endure the pain. What life is if it is just full with laughter , smile and good things right? Bad things should be happened too. In case to remind myself that this world had a balance when I always demand only a good thing to happen right ?

But everytime hard times comes nowadays I manage to chill and smile and remembered how. How dark my past is to be dark again. And when I'm down due to the thoughts and counting how many people I loved left, I start to open my eyes to see that I still have a lot of people around me and I can live without them. I mean the one who decided to left. 

You know what is the saddest thing that I learn nowadays? That sincerity means nothing at all when you met the wrong person. 

Meeting the wrong person is always seem to be right, and meeting the right person is always seem to be wrong. It takes time to realize but I hope me myself will be more wiser than yesterday and appreciate people around me who still exist cause that's what I have to do when I know time is running faster than I thought and I do not know how longer I will be existing in this world. I just want to make everything right and fixed myself. After what should be after and not going through bullshits again.